Service Name Price and Payments Accepted
Basic Overnight Security $100.00 per week. Certain discounts apply based on the availability of the client's neck
Round-The-Clock $200.00 per week. See note above. Daytime discounts may be applied where the client is able to provide raspberry jam and quantities of wood pulp and motor oil.
Digital Demon ™ Online Security $5.95 annually. Smack on the Back of the Head service is priced at $0.25 per instance of inappropriate behavior. Payment plans available.
Hauntings $75.00 per night. Money-back guarantee if the individual does not change the specified behavior.
Spells and Potions Priced per potion, from $3.95 for basic sneezing spells, to $29,495.00 for guaranteed love potions.